Nervous Presenters
Are you ?
And here is a dutch article on how to make a nervous presenter even more nervous…
I thought it was Very Funny, and right on the mark with some examples. Kick it into a translator, if you are curious…
Note: the article in dutch is 100% joke, but I still want to point out some items…
So why would you be nervous ?
Firstly, Your boss and the organizers will tell you how much depends on Your Presentation. Your job, your reputation, and your career are not the only things at stake. You are also playing with the future prosperity of your boss, your clients, and the organizers of the events: You Better Not Blunder Now!
Moreover, you are up against some Serious Competition: The Previous speakers were all Major Rock Star people, with über-trendy hairstyles, and Supercool Slides. You didn't bring your own hairdresser?, no personal stylist and make-up artist ? Tell me you at least brought your private Yoga-coach ?
You better not Blunder Now!
We all so admire your Courage: going in front of an audience with your visible armpit-sweath takes a lot of nerve. Just don't forget to change shirts afterwards bcse last time we could smell you from a mile away. Please don't Blunder Now!
And could you please say Bienvenue, Benvenuta, Zdravo, Ласкаво просимо and Willkommen to the international guests on the front-row? They paid for the VIP package and if you don't impress them, they will want their money back (we are not hinting at deducting your paycheck, yet…). You Better not Blunder Now.
Oh, and by the way, there are two renowned experts in the room: they will want to correct your mistakes just to show They Know it All, and you didnt understand the manual. And they might do some sales-pitch, because you clearly didnt use the product correctly. Don't Blunder with them.
The staf just informed us the HDMI cable is damaged. You will have to connect to the display using VGA. Bring your adaptor. Please don't Blunder there.
Oh, and make sure your liability-insurance will cover any medical- or mental-emergencies that you might cause to the audience. We had two epilepsy-attacks and one fatal cardiac-incident last week. Do you know CPR? You didn't blunder there, did you ?
Stil want to speak at conferences: Here are my tips. (and yes it can be Fun)
Still a bit nervous after reading this... check the MASH program again.
Now you are All Set.
Good Luck with your presentation.
No worries, in 1 hr from now it will all be over, one way or another. Just don't Blunder, OK?
(blondie, because of the uplifting music...)
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